I see so many parents worrying already about their grade-school-aged children’s futures. DH and I are guilty of it too. While some folks have to worry about where their child’s next meal will come from or whether their child will survive an illness, overcome an impediment or outgrow a serious character flaw, others have the luxury to worry about whether their child will choose and pursue “the right” career, one that’s both successful and fulfilling, someday. While no one can predict the future or control all their future life circumstances, there is something we can do today to give our kids an edge in life: instill in them a problem-solving mindset.
Sometimes the simplest tidbits of mind-blowing wisdom hit me in the middle of a casual, unplanned conversation. This morning at dropoff, I was chatting with a school mom friend who works as a program manager for Google’s Computer Science Education Initiatives. Part of her job is to figure out how to introduce and help underrepresented kids (in terms of both race and gender – i.e., girls) integrate their imaginations with technology – to give them opportunities for learning and developing skills in coding, programming, problem solving, logic and physics.
As we marveled over today’s plethora of available and expanding career paths, which didn’t exist (or we’d no clue existed) when we were kids, she shared some invaluable advice:
“Don’t ask your kids what they want to be when they grow up. Ask them what problem they want to solve when they grow up.”
Whoa. That is so smart. (After all, their future career, position or industry may not even exist yet. Some of ours hadn’t yet materialized when we were still kids, right?)
Hey Shakespeare!
“To be or not to be,
That is [NOT] the question.”
“To solve or not to solve,
That is the question.”
In fact, we should ask our children every morning, “What problem do you want to solve today?” And then ask them at the end of the day how they went about solving, or attempting to solve, that problem. Their answers may be anything from making it to the potty on time every time, to confronting or discouraging a bully, resolving an odd-man out friendship issue, or mastering a certain math, language or science concept they’ve been struggling with. Whatever it may be, get them thinking about how to tackle life’s big and little problems and questions, how to help themselves and others, and they will make and leave the world a better place. Prepare your kids for powerful living: train and equip them to identify problems and brainstorm solutions on the daily.
As some of you know, I recently returned from a blogging conference. And my first and perhaps most important take-away was the need to closely examine and ask myself, “How can I change the world through my writing?” Or in less daunting words – “What problem(s) can I help my readers solve?” “What question(s) can I help them answer?” What am I good at, or knowledgeable about, that can be shared to enhance others’ lives?
While I continue to figure that little question out, I challenge us to ask ourselves too each morning, “What problem do I want to solve today?” And at the end of the day, “How did I do?” Make this a practice, learn to be a solution, and it won’t just be Gen Z but all of us who make and leave the world a better place.
Angela Kim says
Love this post! What problem can I solve today? has been a question that I’ve been pondering about for some time now. Being a virgo, ENFJ (sometimes INFJ) I’m very idealistic so my question goes as far as “What can I do today to change the world?” I think I’ve thought this since being a little girl so I would have the grandest dreams (i.e. being the next female politician, being a literature professor, etc) and ended up a mom of two kids. lol! But thanks Anita for this reminder.. I needed it today, and now I’m pondering about it for my next blog post…
Anita says
You and me both. I think we ALL need that reminder daily, Angela. That’s why I was ever so grateful to my friend for posing the question that way and getting me rethinking things too. As for your larger ambitions of former days, don’t worry. You’re still helping…and solving, every day, mama. Every day.
I have been asking my son a similar question, “What are you going to do today to work on fixing this?” I am referring to his failing algebra grade and after letting him ‘handle it’ himself for a couple weeks, I saw he had no idea how to go about it. The question requires specific action, rather than passively experiencing their days.
Indeed. Words without action mean nothing. Question: is he himself motivated or wanting to “fix” this problem? I ask only bc there’s a difference (wrt motivation) between asking “How are you going to fix this problem today?” and “What problem do YOU want to fix today?” As a mom, I find I can’t force my kid(s) to care about something. It’s only when they themselves care that there is a chance for change/improvement.
Brilliant!!! Thanks. Lucky me being friends with such brilliant women.
Thanks but right back at ya. You, my dear, are a wealth of info, tips and helpfulness generally.
You are making my wheels turn… I love the approach, yet I fear that I may not be able to answer that question every day.
Oh, I’m not sure I could either but I bet if we got in the habit of asking ourselves (and later trying to answer)that question every day, it would mold us all into movers and shakers, not just taskmasters.
Great question to ask everyday! Love it…thank you for sharing! 🙂
AH-HA! Makes complete and total sense! Thanks for putting this out there – I find it so difficult trying to parent better than my parents and their parents. Different times call for different changes.
I love this approach! I’ve told my daughter not to limit herself in thinking about what she’s going to be when she grows up, because it may not even exist yet, but this is a much better way to prepare for it. Problem-solving and innovative thinking is critical, not just for our kids, but for all of us.
Great new question for the end of the day, too: “What problems did you solve today?” Much more likely to elicit more than a one-word answer. =)
Oh, I’d be very curious…and humbled (ha!) to hear K’s answers at the end of the day, Shenne. 🙂